10 Step Recipe For Successful Lobstah Feast (Maine Style)

1. Combine several lobstermen and retirees in campground.
2. Mix strong drinks and spread evenly among lobstermen and retirees.
3. Unload a bunch of large coolers and cookers from truck bed (carry all to feast location).
4. Stand around steam pots, exaggerate weights of lobstah.
5. Consume drinks while watching lobstah steampots. 
6. Mix well with laughter and slaps on backs. Sprinkle heavily with compliments to one another.
7. Devour lobstah, belch and retire to campfire.
8. Tell several lies around the campfire, allowing lobstah to digest. 
9. Fall asleep in lounge chair; awake abruptly to rain in the face after midnight.
10. Repeat as desired.

For best results use at least two lobstermen for each retiree. 
Note: Real Lobstermen only wear shirts with buttons for special occasions.



Add wives to control overheating and as needed, dogs for cleaning up spills.



Unruly wives should be kept to a pen by themselves.



To avoid overexertion, retiree loads should be limited to empty pots
Younger, stronger lobstermen are better suited for carrying heavy coolers of lobstah.

This is where the "exaggeration" part is important. A few outrageous lies thrown in here add flavor.



Lobstah pot



It's a good practice to allow retiree to feel for "steam" from lobstah pot.
It may be a good idea to have a wife on standby to throw melted butter on retirees or lobstermen if necessary.



Use wives generously when heating oil for clam frying.

Retirees and lobstermen alike overindulge in lobstah eating.



Good lobstermen always have a surprise trophy crab to spring during the lobstah feast



Retirees should always be allowed to make the biggest messes during a lobstah feast

Thanks again to Lori and Errol, Gleason and Barbara, Donnie and Gina.  What wonderful memories we have to share.